A beautiful disaster is still beautiful.
Today has been the first day I can wake up, write, and say I feel good.
My head has been a swirl of questions about my life, relationship, and especially how I am and who I show up as in the world. I went into the jungle for a week, and to be completely transparent, it wasn’t easy, except not for the reasons I expected.
I always have and will continue to hold myself to a status that sometimes is impossible for me to attain, I have, at times, lowered this bar so I could reach it, and all it does is frustrate me. That is not who I am; I do not seek mediocrity.
I mean, ya, maybe to the outsider looking, my life is mediocre, at best.
Yet it may seem incredible or a complete disaster. I often describe myself as a beautiful disaster because there is so much beauty in catastrophe. That is where I grow the most; when I am in a hole and think, how will I ever get out of this?
That was me last week. Questioning my life, what am I doing, who am I, is it all a lie, what more is there, or what is the point?
Not that I planned on receiving an answer to these questions, but asking questions always helps me find clarity, especially within myself.
