when i got divorced i did not have kids.. and it was difficult, i can not imagine going through it with children. I have no advice either, except i guess if both parties can be fair.. We actually agreed and just split everything 50/50.. i also made more money but he was working. it was still a disaster. I am not sure there is an easy way, unless both are completely transparent and honest with each other, which is always hard when feeling, and emotions are involved.