Who Needs Andrew Huberman’s Morning Routine When You Have Dogs

A bit satirical

Please don´t bathe me! Photo by author.

I love to read about or watch someone’s perfect morning routine to set up their day for success. I have always wanted to adopt one of these so-called perfect routines.

You know, the ones where you open your eyes and are excited to start the day. You jump out of bed, hop in a cold shower, delay coffee for 90 minutes, and appear bright-eyed and bushy-tailed by 545 a.m.

Wow, that’s the secret success formula?

While working in the hospital, I read the 5 am Morning Club and desperately wanted to be part of it. I had already woke up at 445 to go to work, so I decided to wake up at 4 am.

I followed the steps and always fell asleep on the couch ¨meditating¨. For me, this was a bunch of BS. It did not make me any more successful; it only made me feel like a failure because I could not wake up at 5 a.m. on my days off, and I was not bright-eyed and ready to start the day by 6 a.m.

Instead, I was pissy and couldn’t get any work done, but I always went to yoga, pilates, or a walk. Working out has never been my issue, nor has eating healthy.

Waking up early, yes, that always has been.